Dear fictional people of a monogamous persuasion

If you truly feel that sleeping with an inappropriate someone would burn your current life to the ground, would you please make up your fucking mind? I mean, if you want to burn your life to the ground, I'm good with that and I have a torch right here. But if you do, in fact, like your current life, would you please stop faffing around in private with this person that you find so irresistable, or failing that, would you please take reasonable precautions to avoid getting caught? And above all, would you make a decision and stick with it? Your guilt is spectacularly uninteresting, especially if you keep on going back and screwing your inappropriate interest. If you can't be committed to your legitimate relationship, could you at least be committed to your adultery? Is that really too much to ask? Look, I get it. But there are options. I mean, I've arranged my life so that when I am presented with the irresistible opportunity, it is a minor logistical issue rather than a life-changing debacle. ("Um, David? Yeah, I'm not going to make it home tonight. Could you feed the cats? Thanks. I'll tell you later.") If cheating on your primary partner is actually unthinkable _stop thinking about it_! If it's not unthinkable, if in fact you are thinking, then act in some sort of reasonably constructive fashion. Or burn your life to the ground. Really, have fun.

'K,thx,bye.