And Then There Were Four

[lydy]

I have four delightful, frustrating cats: Naomi is Arwen's littermate, and likes to bully David. Ninja is a fine black cat, the most cheerful cat I have ever known. Nuit is Ninja's littermate, and very sweet, except for her hobby of bullying Lady Jane Grey, and I really wish she'd stop that. Lady Jane Grey has been auditioning for the role of "best cat, grey," but keeps on getting intimidated by Nuit. This is a problem I need to solve.

Arwen died around noon on Saturday at the vet's, at my instigation. At the moment, I feel just fine, not upset at all. On the other hand, I have carefully replaced her footstool at the foot of my bed, after I used it for something, and have not yet thrown out her thyroid medication in the fridge. I'm still pretending.

The title also fits my dead cats, come to think of it. Arwen is the fourth cat I've had to let go. Ember, Lilith, Cholmondley, and now Arwen. I miss them all very much.

Comments

[ginmar.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[faunhaert.livejournal.com]

so sorry

cats are so damn ephemeral
no matter how long its never long enough.

I think about a parrot
65-150 years someone/parrot to bequeath
and live on after me, what to teach that parrot?

sigh
you did the right thing
hugs((( you ))))gently

[lydy.livejournal.com]

"Time is fleeting, madness takes its toll." It's hard, and the longer the live, the more a part of the fabric of life they are, and the bigger hole they rip in reality when they're gone.

[naomikritzer]

:-( I'm sorry.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I'm sorry, too.

[pameladean]

It's so quiet downstairs I don't know what to do.

P.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

She was not so much a talky cat as a complainy cat.  She was always on about something.  I miss her more times than there are times.

[pameladean]

She always sounded as if she were complaining, but sometimes you could have a conversation where she didn't seem to want anything but liked making goat noises.

P.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

I always just assumed that she was recreationally bitching, like I do.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

I know the pretending. I'm sorry.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

I have decided that a little non-dangerous irrationality is a fine thing when dealing with trauma. Thank you for the sympathy.

[gerisullivan.livejournal.com]

Sympathy. My heart is with you.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

Thanks. See you next month!

[carbonel]

I think it was the right time, but it still sucks. I'm so sorry.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

There is no right time. But it was not clearly the wrong time. Thank you.

[icecreamempress.livejournal.com]

I am sorry for your loss. It sounds to me that she was well beloved and will live on in memory.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

She was, and she will. I got her ashes back, today. Need to figure out what to do with them. Mind you, I still have the ashes of Lilith, who died numerous years ago, which I haven't done anything with. It feels so final, to scatter them or put them in an urn.

[rushthatspeaks.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry. Much sympathy, for your loss and for having to do the hard and necessary thing and doing it.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

Thank you. My thought are with you, as well. I know you are in the run up to the same tragedy, and it is so hard.

[eileenlufkin.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry for your loss.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[bibliofile.livejournal.com]

Fare thee well, Arwen. Hugs to you, Lydy.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

She was a fine cat, even if she never did like to be hugged. (Ninja, now, Ninja likes hugs. Also kisses. He's one weird cat.) Thank you for the hugs.

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

Am a bit late to comment, but I know you still miss her. So sorry she has gone. I hope she inhabits the corners of your vision and your dreams for some time to come.

K.

[lydy.livejournal.com]

I do, indeed, still miss her. Thank you.

She has yet to come back to visit. I think she's still mad at me. Both Lilith and Ember came back as ghosts for brief visits right after they died. For years, I kept on seeing Lilith out of the corner of my eye. I do hope Arwen comes back, at least once, to say good-bye. (I don't actually believe in ghosts, but these visits from dead people are comforting to me. Scott Imes visited me in my dreams for years. I assume this is some interesting psychological structure of my own brain. But I do really hope Arwen visits me again.)