Plague Diary, In Which I Am Disorganized

[lydy]

This will not be a well-formed post.  But I do want to at least check in, and give a general status.  

So, last week, I was still going to work.  I was dubious as to the wisdom and safety of this, but I don't make the decisions, and I need the paycheck.  As a precaution, they decided that we would not do any CPAP titrations, for fear of aerosolizing COVID-19.  At the same time, I was assured that, you know, people don't go to sleep studies if they are sick (I can assure you, they most certainly do, although not often) and that we just needed to ask them if they had or have had a fever.  I have a lot of feels about this, especially since we know that it spreads while someone is still asymptomatic, my co-worker has had a kidney transplant is is permanently immunodeficient, and the happy talk is directly contradicted by the order not to do titrations.  On Friday, we had a patient who was really, really bad.  Constant apneas, oxygen levels dropping into the high 60s, you know.  We elevated the head of the bed, which helped, but damn, that man really needs CPAP.  

On Monday, (the 23rd) I got the call from my manager saying that the directive from Gov. Walz stating that medical procedures which use PPE which are neither urgent nor necessary should be cancelled.  After consultation with our legal department, they have decided that in-lab sleep studies are in that category, and that I should not go to work.  At the moment, they will continue to pay me.  No one knows how long this will go on, nor how long they will continue to pay me.  My manager opined that they can't prevent people from getting medical care forever.  I do not feel like he is thinking long-term, at all.  

David went shopping on Monday.  We agreed that the usual routine of both of us shopping together increased the risk and was inappropriate.  We had stocked up some the previous week, and we have been cooking a lot.  We've bought a lot more tupperware containers to keep the left overs in.  Some years ago, I bought a chest freezer because bed bugs (no, I do not want to talk about it, thank you very much), and that's been handy.  The thing about laying in a lot of pre-cooked meals is that if either of us gets sick, there's just a ton of food to eat that doesn't require anything more than a microwave.  And, you know, it keeps, so I can eat it for lunches, should I ever get to go back to work.

I've been experimenting with bread.  The impulse ... appears to have some theological content.  Don't ask me, ask my brain.  In a chat with Jo Walton, I said that I had gone from bread to the divine in record time.  Jo responded that I wasn't even close, the record was four words, "This is my body."  I have also been talking to Abi Sutherland, because I wanted sour dough, and she pointed me at some web pages, and I've started the process of making sour dough starter, and in another 6 days, it should be starter enough to make bread.  There's something weirdly soothing and nurturing about bread.  I made Marissa's rosemary buns, last night.  I forgot the salt, but they were still rather nice.  I liked kneading.  One of the things about bread is that it's all about transformations.  On the other hand, it's also all about math, and I am afeared.  The recipe that Abi recommends is extremely mathy not not very progrommatic.   Sigh.  Another six days before I have to worry about that.

I also got overly touchy about David's critique of my buns.  If there's a lesson, there, it's that in these times of stress, it is probably good to be extra kind and gentle with our loved ones.

The cats seem to like having us at home.

I really, really want breakfast sausage and/or thick-cut bacon.  I have so far been able to talk myself out of going to the coop, but it's hard.  Also, the whole bread obsession thing started when I couldn't go to the coop for my usual really good bread.  My bread is not and will not be that good.  But, well, it's fresh-baked, so there's that.  Maybe if I do shopping in another couple of days, I will get breakfast meat.

I am clearly stressed, and very slightly dissociated.  Normal stress reaction.  The one weird thing that my body is doing under stress is deciding that it's going to sleep a normal amount of time and at night. Which, if you know me, is weird.  I"m in bed between ten and eleven every night, and up between six and seven every morning.  How is this even my life?  Hopefully, I'll be able to go back to nights once I'm not so stressed.

Hmm, I did warn y'all that this would be disorganized.  Sorry.  

Hope you are all well and safe.  

Comments

[quadong]

Good to hear from you!

Wot? Salt in bread? How unFlorentine!

[lsanderson]

“You shall find out how salt is the taste of another man's bread, and how hard is the way up and down another man's stairs.”

― Dante Alighieri

[green_knight]

it's also all about math

Eh?

1 teaspoon of salt
1 teaspoon of yeast
300ml water (a little more for wholemeal)
500g flour

The rest is stuff I do by feel - kneading time (I use a hand mixer), linseed, sunflower seeds, herbs to taste. Stop proofing when the dough has risen enough (should be noticable but not so much it gets bubbly). For me, this does not scream 'maths'.

And your bread cannot possibly be as bad as my first attempt, which was bonafide dwarven bread: very very flat and very very dense. And extremely tasty.


I hope your work will continue to pay you from afar. That's an additional worry no-one should have.

[lisajulie]

I think the mathy part is creating the sourdough - discarding a measured weight, adding a measured weight of both flour and water. Then to make the loaf, measuring all the ingredients.

[green_knight]

Ah, thanks, that makes a lot of sense. I'm not familiar with the care and feeding of live sourdough. (Too risky: mould allergy.)

Must. Read. Better.

[lydy]

So, the web site that Abi pointed me to, as her grail for really good sour dough, really has a lot of math. Here's the page:

https://www.theperfectloaf.com/beginners-sourdough-bread/

I mean, serious Baker's Math.

I am planning on, well, fudging it quite a bit. Because me and math, well, you know.

I really like sourdough bread, though. Hopefully I will get the hang of it. I am thinking about what to name the starter. (Apparently most people name their starter.) When I was a kid, my mother got a starter called "Herman." Which leads me to think perhaps I should name mine Hermione. Anybody have other useful suggestions?

[carbonel]

You could call it "Pandora," because she started many things.

[lydy]

Or Demeter, I suppose. What with being the goddess of grain, if I recall correctly. I dunno. We'll wait until the 8th day to christen it.

[lydy]

Wait, wasn't Hermione's last name Granger? Because if so, I'm pretty sure its name is Hermione. (You can rename the child whatever you want.)

[carbonel]

Also, I got started with the no-knead bread thing because someone brought some really good bread to a potluck and I asked for the recipe. It turned out to be a no-knead sourdough recipe, and since I didn't have any sourdough starter, that was, as it were, a non-starter. But I found another receipt that wasn't sourdough online, and that's the one I've been using.

But if you have any interest in no-knead sourdough, I can see if I still have the email.

[lydy]

I actually quite like kneading but having that in the arsenal for when my wrists aren't up to it might be quite nice.

Bread

[magenta]

Bread is actually very forgiving, but it is a lot of work. I've been baking muffins for that reason. If you are really craving sausage, I have an extra package of Hormel breakfast sausage, just remind me of your house number.

Re: Bread

[lydy]

You are so kind. I did make it to the coop today, and bought both bacon and breakfast sausage. I did not buy bread, I was very restrained.

[graydon]

Modern small bakeries do a couple of things that most home bakers don't consider.

One is to raise the dough in a refrigerator; it takes much longer (can be days!) and the web develops more extensively.

Two is to humidify the oven. That's been around for ages -- there are pictures of pans of water going into brick dome bread ovens from, IMS, the 17th century -- but it's not the sort of thing people usually do with their home oven. (and the pro break ovens have misting systems and settings and so on, it's a lot finer control than you get with a pan of water.)

But, hey, you're producing bread. That is a thing.

[lydy]

As things go along, I will probably have time to raise it in the refrigerator, and may well try that. I have read numerous places talking about the necessity of humidity in the oven. One of the things a lot of people recommend is using a dutch oven. I have a cast iron one, but it may not be large enough. Ponder, ponder, ponder.

Bread is, indeed, a thing.

[graydon]

The thing with dutch ovens is that you put in however much dough fits it. If there's a leftover quantity of dough, it becomes dinner rolls or something. But most bread recipes are highly adjustable for quantity. (but not ratio!)

That site Abi recommended is a pro baker talking about making one loaf of bread with the same consistency necessary to a commercial operation. It will absolutely work better if you stick to those rules, but it will work nigh-anywhere in the vicinity.

[lydy]

The cast iron dutch over (with parchment paper) worked beautifully! The crust was wonderful, and the bread quite nice. The size of the loaf fit the dutch oven, too. Bonus. I thought the flavor was a trifle lacking. I wonder if a slower prove, say overnight in the refrigerator, might improve the taste. Eventually, there shall be sourdough starter, and things will all be different.

[graydon]

Yay success!

A bland taste is usually a function of the flour -- there is a definite difference between general purpose flour and specifically bread flour -- or possibly not having enough salt.

(Salt has a role in the chemistry.)

May the sourdough go splendidly!

Dutch Ovens?

[lsanderson]

I have mumble large cast iron dutch ovens if you want to borrow some.

Re: Dutch Ovens?

[lydy]

Thanks so much. The one I have is apparently a 2.5 quart one, and it did the bread just fine! But should I need another one...I guess I know who to ask. How are you and yours doing?

Re: Dutch Ovens?

[lsanderson]

Were fine so far, but more into finifjing bread in the oven than baking it.

I have three sizes of round dutch ovens, but a bit unsure of their sizes.

[thewayne]

Glad to hear that you're doing OK, all things considered. That's good enough for now.

I've been trying to get to bed before midnight and failing miserably. I've got an 11:30am Zoom con Wednesday, and I'd like to get a shower/shave in before so my hair looks acceptable, should be doable. I can skip breakfast if need be. Right now I'm fighting a sinus infection, started antibiotics Thursday and feeling much better.

We had one natural food store in Alamogordo, they'd been around for longer than I'd been here, they closed up shop last year. While two of our three grocers carry some organics, we'd have to go to Las Cruces or El Paso for a good selection, and that just isn't possible these days. I have doubts that our coop in 'Cruces is going to survive this, they've been on shaky ground since Sprouts opened up.

[ckd]

It is good to hear from you.

[boxofdelights]

We are safe and well. Phoebe (fox fox) also just started making bread! She lives in Portland, where there is more than one non-chain bread bakery in walking distance of her house, so this is a first for her. I haven't heard how it turned out yet.

[lydy]

Baking seems to be a common stress reaction.

Have I mentioned, lately, how grateful I am to you and fox fox for question on Habitica with me? Because it has been actually life-changing, and I really do appreciate it more than I say.

Love to all. Please stay safe.

Oh, does she ever get a chance to wear that shawl? I was very proud of it, but it's kind of a lot. (Not as much of a lot as the one I'm working on now, but that one's for me.)

[boxofdelights]

She loves that shawl. She told me once "I think this is my favorite thing I've ever been given."

[lydy]

Wow. That makes me so happy!

[lcohen]

i, too, am a non-normal sleeper who has been sleeping more like a normal person. glad to hear how you are doing and very glad that they are letting you be home and still paying you.

[hrj]

I was commenting elsewhere about how many of my friends are hyper-focusing on cooking currently, and my speculation was that, of the four horsemen--famine, pestilence, war and death--famine is the only one we feel we can engage with on an individual basis.

[lydy]

I think that's certainly part of it. I think it also has to do with it taking time and attention, and that's helpful. And, of course, it's nurturing and that seems important in painful and uncertain times. Food is love. Self-love, sometimes, but love.

[haruspex]

Glad to hear you're doing well, congrats on your loafly breadmaking skills!

[calimac]

Of course it's all about math, and I know just what you mean. Most of my cooking is stovetop and oven casserole dinners, and those you can wing it and be approximate with. But baking, in the narrow sense, needs to be absolutely precise or disaster will follow.

Interesting about your job. B. was stunned to realize that her business (mfr of computer data storage) was classed as essential, but on going in to work for the first time after the shutdown, she convinced them that, with her age and susceptibility, they'd better let her work from home. So she's doing the online part of her job that way, although the next week she had to go in on the first two days due to some crisis, which wasn't a good start.

[lydy]

People promise me that bread is actually very forgiving. So far, either I've been good at following instructions, or the bread is forgiving.

No, that doesn't sound like a good start. Luck, and take care.