I'm scared
Apr. 15th, 2003 03:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lydyI'm scared. I really am. My sweetie would say that I'm being melodramatic. He would ask me what scares me, and for each item that I mention, he would explain why this is a small change -- a bad one, but not one worth having a knot in one's stomach all day long. People have been explaining this to me for twenty years, now, ever since I first started paying attention to politics and world news. It's worse, now. Although it's been incremental, it's a lot worse. Minnesota just passed a so-called Right to Know bill. Minnesota, one of the most strangely liberal states in the Union. "No, no, it doesn't outlaw abortion, Lydia. You're making too much of a fuss over something that's really not very relevant. So a few women have to stay overnight to get an abortion, that's not much of a hardship. Yes, it hits the poor disproportionately, but it won't affect that many women, anyway. Why are you so upset? Of course the anti-abortionists would like this to be the next step to outlawing abortion all together, but they'll never get that far." Never get that far. Never get that far.
In 1975, did anyone ever dream that it would be legal to imprison someone and strip them of their assets _before_ convicting them of a crime? In 1980, who dreamed that we would pay down the deficit -- and in 1990, who dreamed that it would go higher than ever before? When did it become conceivable that we would incarcerate a larger precentage of our population than any other first world country? The Patriot Act is such a comprehensive violation of human rights that it dizzies me. We blame it on the fear and anger of 9/11, causing people to over-react. Would it have been possible without the War on Some Drugs wearing away at our civil rights for the last twenty years? I don't think so. I think that erosion was key to the most recent invasions.
Did you expect Iran/Contra? Did it seem real? Or did it unfold in a slow, surreal, inevitable horror? The President of the United States involved in a CIA operation to sell illegal arms to overthrow a foreign country -- oh, come now. You don't believe that Reagan knew? How about Bush? Not him, either? So, just the CIA gone rogue. The CIA which it is the responsibility of the White House to administer. Nevermind the link to drug money, the executive branch deliberately and _secretly_ acting in direct opposition to the laws of Congress, the laws that they are sworn to uphold. No, no, it's not as bad as I think. We traded guns for drugs for money, illegally, but Ollie North is a great American hero because he can buy an expensive mini-van with spare change.
I don't have smoking guns! Any smoking guns have been carefully hidden, or explained away. After the performance of the news media during the last presidential election, nothing can surprise me. How long have they been reporting that black was white, anyway? They were better. I remember. Good, great, perfect? No, never. But the favoritism they showed Bush during the campaign was utterly shameless and naked. There is a smoking gun, but that one's being hidden using the Purloined Letter method.
What I know is that there are patterns. I don't retain detail, which puts me at a huge disadvantage when trying to discuss these issues rationally. The patterns are not, as some people have suggested, my emotions overlaying current events to create strange interpretations of commonplace things. The War on Some Drugs chilled me in 1980, and the patterns of behavior then were not contradicted by later behavior. No, I can't predict. I can say, "Look at all these elements. This is likely to move in a frightening way, and I'm afraid." "Oh, don't worry. Those are just disconnected events. Honestly, you get so emotional. You don't have a shred of proof." Proof, no, it's true I don't have a shred of proof. All I have are eyes.
What am I afraid of? At home or abroad? The thing that frightens me most is World War III. Here is what I see: North Korea building nuclear weapons again, and the United States State Department completely bungling diplomatic relations. The invasion of Iraq. Worse, the invasion of Iraq without finding any so-called WMD. Our business ties with the Saudis causing the government to turn a blind eye to Saudi terrorists -- or even to blame terrorist acts on someone else. Saddam Hussein was blamed for the 9/11 bombing, and there's no direct link. None of those terrorists were Iraqis, most of them were Saudis. Rumsfeld has made growling noises at, gods help me, Syria and Iran, just the two countries I want up-in-arms while we're trying to occupy Iraq and Afghanistan. A president who argued during the election that nation-building was something that the US should not do, now in charge of building a nation in a region with explosive politics and a populace with limited experience in anything other than repression. Our strong first and second world allies drawing away from us, making us look weaker, damaging our credibility. LOOK AT THIS! No, WWIII isn't invevitable. But with those ingredients, I can make a hell of an explosive soup. I haven't even mentioned nuclear weapons in China, India, and Pakistan, the likelihood that some of the Russian nuclear weapons have gone walk-about, or our policies in Israel and Lebanon. There are days when I'm tempted to the proposition that Bush is courting Armageddon by creating havoc in the Middle East.
Nothing is ever like anything else. However, I keep on feeling resonances with other conflicts that we've been involved in. Vietnam, in particular. Maybe that's just because it was the most recent war we've fought. We toppled a regime, there, hoping to establish a democracy. We occupied the country, trying to liberate it. We destroyed the village in order to save it. Jungles aren't city streets, Fedayeen aren't the Viet Cong. Everything will certainly be different. But some of the things that caused us to fail in Viet Nam seem to be possible, here. Guerilla warfare works in the city. Democracies are constitutionally bad at dealing with that kind of ruthless attack. How will we capture the hearts and minds of the Iraqis as long as it looks like we've invaded them to steal their wealth? How can we persuade them otherwise, when we tighten our grip to defend ourselves from suicide bombings and other terrorist attacks? What happens when American-run hospitals become prime targets? There are answers to all these questions, I think. There are even good answers to some of them. Do you trust Bush and Cheney to find those answers? Have they shown any talent at that sort of thing, so far? How well are they doing in Afghanistan, bringing peace and democracy and a stable economy? Iraq is a player on the world stage. Making the same mistakes in Iraq that we are busily making in Afghanistan -- or even making the same lack of progress, if one assumes that what's happening there isn't the result of mistakes -- will have greater repercussions than poor Afghanistan's troubles.
I'm afraid of having my phone bugged, my email read, my postal mail opened and read, my interent patterns analyzed. I'm afraid of being arrested for associating with the wrong people. I'm afraid of losing my right to protest. I'm afraid of losing the right to an abortion, or a tubal ligation, or birth control. Hey, don't laugh. That's within living memory, damn it.
I'm not saying any of this is going to happen. I don't know who's going to fight whom, which countries will fight which other countries, I don't know what civil rights will become kindling for the constitution. YES, I'm being melodramatic. I'm 40 years old, and I've seen the world become _less safe_ than it was when we were at the height of the cold war, I've watched my government pass ever more unbelievable laws. The patterns are scary. And the Iraqi museum was sacked, thousands of years of Mesopotamian culture set on fire, and a CNN poll says that a majority of people think that it was not important. It feels like the Vandals and the Visigoths have settled in my own country.
Oh, hell. Just melodrama. I'll feel better later. I get scared, then I get better again. But I do wish someone could give me credible reasons why things are going to get better sometime in my lifetime, rather than continuing to get worse.
In 1975, did anyone ever dream that it would be legal to imprison someone and strip them of their assets _before_ convicting them of a crime? In 1980, who dreamed that we would pay down the deficit -- and in 1990, who dreamed that it would go higher than ever before? When did it become conceivable that we would incarcerate a larger precentage of our population than any other first world country? The Patriot Act is such a comprehensive violation of human rights that it dizzies me. We blame it on the fear and anger of 9/11, causing people to over-react. Would it have been possible without the War on Some Drugs wearing away at our civil rights for the last twenty years? I don't think so. I think that erosion was key to the most recent invasions.
Did you expect Iran/Contra? Did it seem real? Or did it unfold in a slow, surreal, inevitable horror? The President of the United States involved in a CIA operation to sell illegal arms to overthrow a foreign country -- oh, come now. You don't believe that Reagan knew? How about Bush? Not him, either? So, just the CIA gone rogue. The CIA which it is the responsibility of the White House to administer. Nevermind the link to drug money, the executive branch deliberately and _secretly_ acting in direct opposition to the laws of Congress, the laws that they are sworn to uphold. No, no, it's not as bad as I think. We traded guns for drugs for money, illegally, but Ollie North is a great American hero because he can buy an expensive mini-van with spare change.
I don't have smoking guns! Any smoking guns have been carefully hidden, or explained away. After the performance of the news media during the last presidential election, nothing can surprise me. How long have they been reporting that black was white, anyway? They were better. I remember. Good, great, perfect? No, never. But the favoritism they showed Bush during the campaign was utterly shameless and naked. There is a smoking gun, but that one's being hidden using the Purloined Letter method.
What I know is that there are patterns. I don't retain detail, which puts me at a huge disadvantage when trying to discuss these issues rationally. The patterns are not, as some people have suggested, my emotions overlaying current events to create strange interpretations of commonplace things. The War on Some Drugs chilled me in 1980, and the patterns of behavior then were not contradicted by later behavior. No, I can't predict. I can say, "Look at all these elements. This is likely to move in a frightening way, and I'm afraid." "Oh, don't worry. Those are just disconnected events. Honestly, you get so emotional. You don't have a shred of proof." Proof, no, it's true I don't have a shred of proof. All I have are eyes.
What am I afraid of? At home or abroad? The thing that frightens me most is World War III. Here is what I see: North Korea building nuclear weapons again, and the United States State Department completely bungling diplomatic relations. The invasion of Iraq. Worse, the invasion of Iraq without finding any so-called WMD. Our business ties with the Saudis causing the government to turn a blind eye to Saudi terrorists -- or even to blame terrorist acts on someone else. Saddam Hussein was blamed for the 9/11 bombing, and there's no direct link. None of those terrorists were Iraqis, most of them were Saudis. Rumsfeld has made growling noises at, gods help me, Syria and Iran, just the two countries I want up-in-arms while we're trying to occupy Iraq and Afghanistan. A president who argued during the election that nation-building was something that the US should not do, now in charge of building a nation in a region with explosive politics and a populace with limited experience in anything other than repression. Our strong first and second world allies drawing away from us, making us look weaker, damaging our credibility. LOOK AT THIS! No, WWIII isn't invevitable. But with those ingredients, I can make a hell of an explosive soup. I haven't even mentioned nuclear weapons in China, India, and Pakistan, the likelihood that some of the Russian nuclear weapons have gone walk-about, or our policies in Israel and Lebanon. There are days when I'm tempted to the proposition that Bush is courting Armageddon by creating havoc in the Middle East.
Nothing is ever like anything else. However, I keep on feeling resonances with other conflicts that we've been involved in. Vietnam, in particular. Maybe that's just because it was the most recent war we've fought. We toppled a regime, there, hoping to establish a democracy. We occupied the country, trying to liberate it. We destroyed the village in order to save it. Jungles aren't city streets, Fedayeen aren't the Viet Cong. Everything will certainly be different. But some of the things that caused us to fail in Viet Nam seem to be possible, here. Guerilla warfare works in the city. Democracies are constitutionally bad at dealing with that kind of ruthless attack. How will we capture the hearts and minds of the Iraqis as long as it looks like we've invaded them to steal their wealth? How can we persuade them otherwise, when we tighten our grip to defend ourselves from suicide bombings and other terrorist attacks? What happens when American-run hospitals become prime targets? There are answers to all these questions, I think. There are even good answers to some of them. Do you trust Bush and Cheney to find those answers? Have they shown any talent at that sort of thing, so far? How well are they doing in Afghanistan, bringing peace and democracy and a stable economy? Iraq is a player on the world stage. Making the same mistakes in Iraq that we are busily making in Afghanistan -- or even making the same lack of progress, if one assumes that what's happening there isn't the result of mistakes -- will have greater repercussions than poor Afghanistan's troubles.
I'm afraid of having my phone bugged, my email read, my postal mail opened and read, my interent patterns analyzed. I'm afraid of being arrested for associating with the wrong people. I'm afraid of losing my right to protest. I'm afraid of losing the right to an abortion, or a tubal ligation, or birth control. Hey, don't laugh. That's within living memory, damn it.
I'm not saying any of this is going to happen. I don't know who's going to fight whom, which countries will fight which other countries, I don't know what civil rights will become kindling for the constitution. YES, I'm being melodramatic. I'm 40 years old, and I've seen the world become _less safe_ than it was when we were at the height of the cold war, I've watched my government pass ever more unbelievable laws. The patterns are scary. And the Iraqi museum was sacked, thousands of years of Mesopotamian culture set on fire, and a CNN poll says that a majority of people think that it was not important. It feels like the Vandals and the Visigoths have settled in my own country.
Oh, hell. Just melodrama. I'll feel better later. I get scared, then I get better again. But I do wish someone could give me credible reasons why things are going to get better sometime in my lifetime, rather than continuing to get worse.
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no subject
Date: 2003-04-15 04:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-15 07:34 pm (UTC)I very much think so too. May I have permission to quote this paragraph? And to link? You have put this very, very well.
"Oh, don't worry. Those are just disconnected events. Honestly, you get so emotional. [...]"
Not a thing I'd want to hear. (Not a thing I'd say to you, either.) And I don't think they're disconnected. I rather wish they were, but....
(And the other thing I wouldn't want to hear is to be told that people only want privacy when they are doing antisocial bad things. so what's all the fuss about civil liberties anyhow? Been there, heard that, had the break-up, and so forth. And I ... well, I know what you mean, I do believe. And I think you're right. Unfortunately.)
no subject
Date: 2003-04-15 08:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-16 09:11 am (UTC)I have people around me telling me that I'm just engaging in "liberal paranoia", and that my objections to what's going on right now are baseless. And that my lack of faith in the goodwill and perception of the sorts of people who think that the museums and libraries are unimportant is ridiculous.
I wish I could believe them.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-16 02:52 pm (UTC)I do not question their good will. It's what they do. Remember when people commonly said that is better that 50 guilty men go free than one innocent man should be convicted?l When was the last time you heard that from the man on the street? _Things have changed_. And some of the changes are terrifying. The desire to put evil-doers in jail is not a desire born out of ill will, but some of the ways that this desire has been satisfied have been ill-conceived. That quote is originally from John Adams, if I remember correctly. He goes on to say that punishing some crimes brings no additional benefit to society, and its deterrence is limited because it will never be possible to know of and prosecute every crime, but if innocence is not a defense, then why should anyone obey the law? That's been seeming a particularly apposite quote, of late.