Poetry for nothing and the chicks are free (that ain't working)

[lydy]

Poetry From Nothing

Anything more than a brief list of circumstances
would become a multi-colored tactile tapestry,
showing things from foreshortened corners
and with the length lost in colors newly unveiled.

As the streaming crayon dies they will leave the ground
and every new day brings colors never seen:
the colors of morning and the colors of dying.

Look, here comes the storm, the call to ascend,
and the new lights show us
what our old days can no longer capture.

Descend, here, with yesterdays treasures,
and try to weave a new line of show
for the first morning's flight

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It would appear that when I am very, very tired, I do automatic writing in email. The piece above is notable for being sent to my mother and being at the very beginning of the email. I remember writing the rest of it. I can even grasp what it was that I was trying to say, and I see no other way to have said it, but I would never try to explain such a thing to Mom. It's not a secret or anything, it's just that I don't think she'll get much more than the gist of it. It is, presumably, fairly opaque to almost everyone. I don't know if it is illuminating to know that I was trying to explain to my mother what it was like to be in the loony bin for 3 days.

---

For Anyone who's interested, the actual automatic writing looked like this:

Anything more than a brief list of circumstances would have to become multi-colored tactile tapestry showing things from foreshortened corners and with the length lost in colors newly unveiled and as the streaming crayon dies they will experience as they leave the ground and every new day brings colors never seen: the colors of morning and the colors of dying. Look, here comes the storm, the call to ascend, and the new lights show us what our old days can no longer capture. Descend, here, with yesterdays treasures, and try to weave a new line of show for the first morning's flight.

I do find it interesting, which is why I included it. I really didn't change much at all.

---

Any critical commentary would be extremely welcome. I'm not above liking a bit of praise, but I'd druther have useful commentary to help with next time. (Yes, it's one of my dirty secrets. I write poetry. Embarrassing, but true.)

Comments

[marykaykare.livejournal.com]

Glad to be able to help.

Because I am a lazy bitch I have posted it friends locked.

MKK

[lydy.livejournal.com]

How will you ever acquire a howling public if you hide away all your work. I mean, Emily Dickenson had to die to gain any noteriety. I read your LJ, so I'll come across it fairly soon, I expect.