lydy | I have been conspired against

"Time Is Like Water", sterling silver & tourmalinated quartz, by Elise Mattheson.

I fell in love with the necklace when I first saw it. Passionately. But it was expensive. Even for an Elisian necklace, it was expensive. I've done a little temp work this summer, but that's it, and poor does not adequately cover the state of my finances. Impoverished comes closer. I was eaten up with crazy passion for the necklace, tried to conceive of insane schemes or long-term loans that would enable me to buy it. I began being a pest, where all of my interactions with

elisem were also about the necklace. I was ashamed of myself. I finally resigned myself to the reality that the necklace belonged to someone else. I didn't really believe it, I knew it belonged to me really, but I understood that someone else was going to take it and care for it. I stopped being a pest. I stopped asking to see it. I didn't stop thinking about it, but I was no longer spinning manic impossible plans.

elisem told me it was on hold for someone who wasn't sure yet if she was going to get it.

Tonight, after dinner,

ddb said we had to stop by

elisem's for a thing. Did I mind? Not at all.

elisem greeted me with a little box, and I got all wide-eyed and quiet because I knew what this had to be from the look in her eyes, and the way

ddb was standing next to me, and it was a new world all of a sudden. There was a card, with the names of the people who conspired to get me "Time Is Like Water" because they thought I should have it. Not everyone's name is on the card, so I've only been able to thank the people whose names were there. Thank you, anonymous gifters.

It's been a bit of a trudge, just recently. No disasters, but I haven't been very "up". Tonight, I've been sitting here in my bed with the necklace on (I'll take it off when I have to lie down) thinking, "Wow, people love me. Wow." Just wow.

When I fell in love with the necklace originally, I noticed that its name was five syllables. I played around with a lot of haiku using "Time is like water" as the first line. I threw most of it out, but I did develop a clear image in my head of what I wanted to say. Tonight, as I typed out thank you emails, the haiku shook itself out and I realized that "Time is like Water" was the third line, not the first. It's not a very good haiku, but I'll share it with you.

Water on flagstones,
sudden mirrors in the sun.
Time is like water.